Joe, Blogging Molly's RoomBoy/FriendMate, is out of town. Since Blogging Molly shares a comically tiny one-bedroom with said BoyMate, its been a little quiet since he left. Hence the previous post, displaying an inappropriate amount of excitement for the veggie corn dogs i am cooking right now.
But, being home alone, I am reminded of the way that television has a knack for... how do I say... "Freaking the Fuck Out of You." Here's my TV-Guide-for-the-Home-Alone-Gal.
DO NOT WATCH:
1) Unsolved Mysteries. Yes, you may watch this ironically at your parents house while home from college, but as soon as you're home alone in your own place, the ironic distance disappears and those ALIENS ARE RIGHT OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE!!!!
2) X Files. See Above.
3) Law and Order. This is hard for me to admit, because I love Law and Order more than almost any other television show. But, much like Unsolved Mysteries, the hilarious drama that one experience while sharing the show with a loved one becomes HORRIFYING potential reality when one is home alone in Brooklyn watching a show about brutal crimes that take place in New York City.
Last but not least,
4) Rescue 911. This one is from childhood. As far as I know, this show was canceled 15 years ago for scaring too many children. Its basically a show that was on the fucking FAMILY CHANNEL about kids getting hurt. When I was young, it was always on EXCLUSIVELY when my parents were working and we had a babysitter at night. When you are a child, home alone, do not watch a show about children hurting themselves while home alone. Luckily, I'm not a child anymore, and I'm not so worried about mountain bike accidents or hurting myself with a tooth brush.
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